Be aware of old boxes, but try not to reopen them. Be aware of old patterns, but try not to awaken them.

The past two days have been immersed in the warm winter sunshine and a book that inspires me to write the like of it someday. Winter got defined itself, just yesterday and a day before. It felt neglected all this while, for it didn’t receive the acknowledgement of the wonderful month of December and the solitude it carries amidst the bone chilling temperature.

Today I gift my time, space and words, for that is all that I have. A walk down the memory lane of the year, that was, brings memories of the years that were travelled:

 I was a brook and so am the same.

 My existence, my darling, has not changed

For obstacles I conquered

And the ones yet to be seen

Shall be transformed through the power

  That you and I carry

As the year bids a farewell, wrapping itself for all that it opened in these 364 days, I wonder what the last five have left to offer?

Of all the moments I recall

The victories make me rise

For they incurred through the losses

Of time that suddenly felt lost

And life that felt bereft;

Today the sun shines

With its core with-in me

For the answers lie there

Where ‘I’ meets the ‘profound me’

With hope in my heart and courage in my mind, I stir forward, welcoming the divine, that has always been a part of all of us. Let 2016 be a year of expansion of worldwide Kosenrufu ( world peace, according to Nichiren Buddhism).

My wish for you this year:

The smiles are there to spread

For the hearts that carry strength

May you befriend your self

With all the faith that you have

May you reach success

For all the heights you see

May your health support your endeavours

That are waiting to come true

And may solitude be yours

Amidst all colours from black to blue.

Love

Aakriti

12.15pm

26 Dec. 15

On learning not to swim but swim nonetheless

There is nothing new I shall write today or nothing old you haven't worn in yourself in a long-time. We all have been wearing the same worm out clothes for a while,perhaps what changes is not the material they are made of but the textures and colours.

When was the last time you discovered that you carried a strength you were never aware of? Or surprised your self by surpassing your own knowables!? Or exuded so much of hope and optimism in someone else's life even as your own seems to be filled with natural disasters?

A recent introspection and retrospection led me to understand the myriad webs of life which I had been oblivious to all this while. As I understood the older ones, newer ones felt neglected and stirred themselves up to seek my attention.I must they did get what they wanted.As goes for me I learnt to swim without ever learning how to! I'm in the midst of a huge ocean and I just landed on a shore few days back,catching my breath and trying my best not to drown. The spirit wanted to live and grow and the exhausted body yearned for a quiet death. In the midst of the two the spirit grew stronger trying its best to ignore the momentary voices of the body. It swam and swam and swam,flapping its arms and legs as swimming was a knowledge far from any acquaintance. Just when death was standing at the doorstep,I landed on a shore. Here I'm,this is me. A raw body with a raw soul. Im in the process of aging. The cocoon has been left far behind and wings are preparing for a flight of a lifetime.

The sand enwrapped my body like a blanket and the turtles formed a ring. The sky blue in its enamor shined bright, as the cuckoo would sing. The eyes weary and torn refused to welcome the day. The rays of the Sun blessed me at the brink of my death near the bay. The creatures of existence cared for a life not known. It's like Faith took birth in strangers of a clan the universe owned. I rose from the prayers of hope, that which the heart had wished. The heart rises with each day even as the love is missed.

Have a Little Faith

How hard it is to have that little faith, which you’ve always had? That silver lining which you are looking for in the sky is a mere symbol you await, even as everything silver and gold is within you. You told me “It’s hard to carry on Hope. It pains. I don’t wish to let it go”. As you wept mercilessly, the waters drained into streams coloured with the red of prickly anguish. The night was a storm. The windows of the heart creaked loudly for the hinges seemed too weak to hold them. Yet they did their best to hang on.

You opened the book you needed the most. It coaxed you to find what you had and stick like glue to it. You said your money bank was running low and he said      “ Have a Little Faith”. You soaked in his words. I saw you drenched the other day, salt all over your body. Tears had formed their impressions all over your skin. These little drops carry weight of lifetimes. As you let them go, it’s like freeing them from the prison of both eyes and memories. Who said memories are untouchable? If that was so, why do they come with thorns?

It’s been a while since rituals of my religion made their importance felt. We believe in God, yet praying takes a backseat. In the times of today, prayer has become nothing but an obligation. 

To God? Really? 

It has taken a definition of a bribe or maybe sympathy? When in Pain, dial God’s number. If he listens, great; if he doesn’t we tried our best. 

As I walked towards my adulthood, I carried God with me in my heart. I would tell myself these visits to the temple are not needed as I always carried him in my heart. Yet I have found myself visiting the temple in moments when I felt that was the right thing to do. There are voices we all hear, in silence you find them residing. Many have called it “the inner voice”. I haven’t heard it, but have felt it. It has spoken to me in the most profound ways. In meditation, when I would take time from my busy schedules to listen to myself breathe. Faith knows no religion. It never has. It is a belief, in the goodness of humanity. If you lost yours on the way, Mitch Albom offers you a lake full of Faith to carry some buckets from.

If you are looking for a companion in silence, where you can earnestly answer the most painful questions of life and death, grab this little gift by Mitch Albom. Trust you’ll be in good company. You’ll feel loved, cared for and most importantly feel blessed and offer nothing at the end but gratitude.

                                            

Stay Blessed

Love

Aakriti

Dungeons that saw light

“Do you know how this world is filled with mazes and how we end up entering another only to be relieved by finding way out of the last one?” “On second thoughts, do we ever find a way out, not until we are alive, right?” so began the saga of asking questions flickered by that moments  in which Light would fall on Pain, leading the wound to seethe than to soothe; that which took its own insights to welcome the cure at its best time. Pain was not the only one, down there, it had company. The companies of the others however were fleeting in nature, like a whiff of air, seen for a few seconds and drifting away, only to be invisible, but at the same time, being present. The other day I heard some voices, screaming for Help, filled with Agony, Misery and above all Helplessness and Worthlessness. Amidst those voices resided lakes of Anger, Guilt and Confusion. And far away at the horizon, which had yet to be discovered, lay Peace. As the voices got louder and louder and louder, heaving a want for Death and for Anguish to end, Silence befell and asserted its existence. The lakes dried for few minutes, cleared and made way for Insight, to gather itself and emerge in Hope and Faith. They always go together. Here they were sitting patiently besides Insight. Their silence eased the Pain into tiny molecules which the body felt escaping away from it. As that happened, the wounds came closer and lit up with new molecules which took the place. These were a gift from Belief, handed over by Hope and Faith. Just as the Silence weaved its magic, the Insight gave Pain a hug filled with Perseverance and Care. The echo of the loud voices faded away gradually, now beckoning the other dungeons which were unexplored, which had yet to be entered, only to make Pain feel its presence, not now, but later. For now, it knew that “it had been saved”. However, that was not the end of it. Just before this realisation set in, Wisdom, quietly perched on a rock, a witness to all the events finally parted its lips to say what was ought to be said: “My Dear, you are saved only if you want to be saved”. With this it spread its huge wings and disappeared into an opening, which no one knew about. There sat Pain whose hands were held by Hope and Faith, heart by Belief and mind by Perseverance. In that moment they seemed like a united family, ready to strive and ready to thrive. As goes for the Light, it was there amidst the Darkness.

Form-less shape waiting to be formed!

Kids these days learn things faster than perhaps you did. Interestingly enough even as they might know of the many shapes, my talk is with you, adults! Oh yea, you see, I’m formless, no edges, no curves, no angles, no area, no perimeter. In short, existence, but no recognition!

It‘s a different thing to live, but living together being someone ah, altogether a different scale. I do come from an existing species, you may not have heard about it, wonder ever seen. Sometime back when I guised myself as a cloud I heard the birds chirping that humans have microscopes to see things which are miniscule and they have in fact made great progress with that instrument. Fascinating, very fascinating!

In our clan, the elders have been recognised through their share of hard work and they have earned their share of respect too. I, however, ummm, these days am waiting to be formed. Now, Its not that there is a stage- like process like becoming of a butterfly, wish it was that easy, it’s very very complex, certainly difficult for me to explain.

I’m out of my clan too and whenever I talk, it’s not sweet. May be you humans can term it ‘identity crisis’? Yes, well I heard that word once, so I’m guessing it may be closer to that for you. My dictionary however has a lot more going on in the inside than the outside.

A friend recently asked me ‘Hey Less-ly, how are you?” And I said the most common lie which you humans speak, certainly with a fake smile “I’m fine!” . Now, don’t get me wrong, but tell me, you guys lie it so often, don’t you? Simple question with a prefabricated  simple lie. Surprisingly enough I feel close to you people at the moment in that context. We here don’t usually lie. Sharing of expression comes easy to us. In the face of adversities, we sit like a family, even the neighbours and discuss things. Tears are shared and so are joys.

The other day I was morning dew which a girl of 5 year old saw settled on a leaf with the others. She simply plucked the leaf and preserved it in a jar with open holes. For days together, she talked to me. I hardly talked with other dew drops; you see I needed ‘my’ time. I quietly listened to her voice so sweet and songs so melodious. Oh! Not songs, her mother said they were ‘poems’. I wonder what the difference is between the two. Any ways, but it was not from her that I learnt to lie for she was a beauty of innocence and purity.

Her mother came to me the other day, I was surprised to see her talk to me. That is when she told me this secret. She in her teary eyed voice said to me “Hey beauty, I’ll tell you something. There is so much in this heart, heavy as a stone. I wish I could drain it like water but it refuses to melt. The weariness has been killing me every single day and every passing moment. I don’t wish to talk, don’t wish to explain, can you just understand, dewy beauty?” I too had tears in my form-less eyes. Now, you may think how can a dew get more teary than it already is, but well, like I told you, I wasn’t still recognised.

So, yes, I thought why not try out the lie I learnt from her. Guess what? It worked with that imaginary firend I mentioned a while back. In fact, my family and friends were surprised enough to see me lying like that. And after a few seconds they all laughed “ Ah! Dear darling, we know you’ve been having a hard time, but to us, you can never lie. You may be a novice and we would never want you to learn that art of lying but more important than that is to be true to yourself. You are a great baby dear and one day you’ll make us shapes proud of where you reach. A form no one would have ever seen, or even if seen, you’ll be unique. A star that’ll shine it’s own glory!”

That moment, I regained my lost self, I wept and wept and then I smiled for I had formed this invisible friendship with that little girl who befriended me. Her smile was the purest I had ever seen. The day I become what I have to, I’ll thank her.

We don’t have a God here in our land, but we have faith. Strong faith in our hearts makes us live what we are. I learnt the word God from that little girl too. What’s God? Who’s God?

Anyway I got to go……..

Living out each day….each moment….trying to smile…..to be that form ….one day!