Sunday, August 29, 2010

The chill

Have u ever experienced a cold sweat on your forehead?
Or one that tingled your spine in the midst of hot and humid weather?
Ever felt the terror of losing things, yet you had it all?
Ever felt like falling from a cliff, tall and high,
To immerse yourself into the ocean, with a loud cry?
Ever felt like holding to someone,
Whom you yearned, yet had never seen?
Ever thought of how your loved ones would cry,
As you stopped your journey, even before you started?
Ever felt the longing to feel the intense emotion,
Of loss and victory, the one named as “love”?
Ever thought of pausing your life,
To introspect, the layers within?
Ever thought of what life is about,
Not the seen, but more of that wasn’t?
And even if you thought, don’t know how you would feel?
The answers unspoken, which guarded themselves with shields?
This ubiquitous life of ours, the one without an end,
Which continues to exist, as does its scent,
And as I seek some truths, the unspoken ones,
A chill embraces me, leaving me bewildered,
Before I could realise its true need.

Monday, August 23, 2010

The labyrinth

HI! Welcome to this new world of mine. A world, where exists no linear relationships, that which are simple to understand, a world where all you get is to think, to think and TO THINK! A world where you may not get answers to your problems and doubts, instead more questions and thoughts to ponder over.
I really do not know whether it seems a roller coaster ride to all of you or not, but I personally feel as if I’m traveling through a deep, dark, long tunnel, which at some times lets the sun rays peep in, but more often than not it is darkness what resides deep within.
Coming to the point, it’s been a week since I started off with my Masters in Psychosocial Clinical Studies (Phew, my mind sighs even as I write the name). Ever since I began with the real work, my mind has been running on its own treadmill, poor Brainy, it gets so tired. No wonder then that my University’s decision to not teach us more than 4 hours a day was indeed a thoughtful one.
This is a very different place to be in, exhausting, mind- boggling, creative at the same time very taxing. There is so much of Philosophy, Politics, Sociology, Anthropology, and so less of ‘Psychology’ (though that’s not what we wanted, but chose it for ourselves, at least me). So, in a way it’s like saying the whole universe of Social Sciences resides in our class, thanks to our Brainy and Intellectual teacher, an alumni of Harvard, in Anthropology!

It might seem all so cool, but the truth it isn’t! But yes, I’m sure, it’s just the beginning, we do have a long way to go. I feel so sad for him, he is such a storehouse of ‘knowledge’ and ‘Information’ but when it comes to helping us understand something, poor guy, he finds it so hard to simplify, but ends up bombarding us with the names of the ever so great philosophers and by using jargons we have not even read all this while!
And then I’m all in awe of him, not always, though. Lately (Though it’s only been a week) my brain has got so tired of listening to the same things over and over again that it has started finding humor in between all this chaos and confusion that floats in my cerebrospinal fluid. And yes, I’m proud of this defense that it is using, what better way to face things?
But listening to him does makes me feel that ‘I know nothing at all’, simply ‘NOTHING’. There’s so much out there waiting to be read and to be explored and we people (especially “me”, don’t know about you) waste so much of time doing silly things. But yes at the same time I do feel that no degrees , no qualifications makes a person superior enough, for the fact is that at the end of the day an intelligent person is one who can communicate his/ her idea across in the most simplest, yet the best possible way!
I decided to enter this maze on my own will and choice, I do have many others who are accompanying me too, but we all are on our own paths, trying to learn from each step we take forward and backwards. No wonder, it is rightly said that to achieve some thing, we do need to put in a lot of efforts. I guess, time has come to whisper in my ears that I’m finally doing MASTERS!

Friday, August 20, 2010

Subliminal connectivity

Perhaps this word might seem unheard of, or for that matter unread of before. Surely, you never came across this one in the Oxford dictionary? True, you didn’t. ‘Cause I just created it. In Psychology, subliminal perception, means perceiving things that we are not consciously aware of. For example, you go to watch a movie, and are talking to your friend, and as the images on the screen persuade you to go buy popcorn, you consciously do not pay a heed to them, but after some time, you do indeed find yourself lined up in the queue, even before few moments ago, you weren’t feeling hungry! That is subliminal perception for you!

Now what is subliminal connectivity? Ever tried to ponder upon, why is that that your life is surrounded by some “chosen ones” and not “just anyone”? Well, I tried thinking over it. And here I’m sharing my thoughts with you.

Why is it that the path our lives take, choose to intersect with those of these chosen people not anyone else? And it’s not only after we have spent a good amount of time interacting with them, do we realise our inability or mere coincidence of having bumped into them over many others, only for the good!

I thought that perhaps being a Sagittarian, an adaptable sun sign, would at least in an unspoken way make me adaptable enough to go along with those sharing the same sign as mine. A rather lame presumption, but it was in good time that I realised that though there were some with whom I gelled well, there were many more with whom I didn’t! (However, this simply does not make me less adaptable, for the fact is that we in life choose to overlook things which will make us feel less worthy about ourselves). So does this mean that the former ones were simply the “chosen ones” to be a part of my friend circle, or I perhaps unconsciously was emitting some energy waves, or was giving them the vibes, that I was better off with them than “ some others”!

Who knows? Now where is this who? I want to know everything he knows. But it is hard to find him, for his existence cannot be pinpointed unlike ours. I think there is more than just connectivity, chemistry and the mere energy which surrounds us that makes us interact with “some” and not everyone. And to that science too cannot find answers. Why? You may ask. ‘Cause that very answer chooses to remain a mystery.

My language to some of you might seem incomprehensible, but to be honest, I myself know and am aware of every word I write. And even if it seems difficult to interpret I won’t blame you, because not all things need that linear pattern of thought to help you understand, there are many which your mind grasps, only if you “choose” to give it some of your true moments of existence. To be precise and clear, some things are abstract, though easy to understand; all you need is that bent of mind to delve into the layers!

As I talk of layers, as any relationship blossoms, it sheds its outer layers, and begins to expose it’s “real” self in some time, and in this fast forward life of ours, even before the blink of an eye, we are past all the shedding, lying naked to a reality which we ourselves were unaware of. In such moments, the eyes glimmer only when the heart knew and felt the beauty with which each drop of the petal formed an impeccable heart on the floor of life. And if not, the person is left weeping, immersed in the dust of guilt and despair, leaving no option to make any amends.

This very awareness makes me share with you, that life is a lot more than the trivial fights, worries. People and friends who surround us and are part of us are worth taking a note of. ’Cause it’s not a mere co-incidence, but alot more, the reason that they are with you, and no one else. This is how I define subliminal connectivity!

Wishing you a joyous life ahead. Keep exploring as you tread your path on to your final destination.

Bon voyage!!

Saturday, August 14, 2010

The world of GIRLS

Flowers? Chocolates? Teddies? Perfumes? Accesssories? What do girls like? Not one, not two, but all of them. So are u thinking of buying them all? On the other hand you needn’t. Why? I’ll tell you.

On behalf of all the girls out there here is a simple yet thoughtful account of what we girls think. Yeah, I know you might have read plenty of self- helps books on relationships, “Men are from Mars and women are from Venus” and blah and blah, but a real account may be of greater help.

Well, gifts are accepted anytime, after all who doesn’t like surprises? That too pleasant ones. But more than anything else that matters is a decent and an enjoyable company. Not a boring one.

And what matters the most is due respect which we ought to get. Our self- esteem, the way we carry ourselves, our style of talking and communicating, and our personality might say and convey a lot about us, but “individual differences always exist”.

I personally feel that we girls are very accommodating. And that is very true too. I wonder why guys find it so difficult to impress and make us happy. For the fact is that even the simplest of the gestures like a smile, a thank you, a genuine expression of care matters. And when it comes to gifts, there are endless options, so practically speaking; there shouldn’t be much of a problem. It’s as clear as crystal, we don’t want you to go out of way to do things for us. Simplicity has more meaning than anything else.

Another thing, we all know that there are some definite and fine lines which do exist between guys and girls. Like girls are sensitive, emotional, nurturing, keep a tab on the smallest of the things, are amazing when it comes to multi- tasking; well you might be thinking that we can’t hear you, but the almighty bestowed us with extra- sensory perception that we can hear and look at you even if you think we are looking away. So you better watch out. .

Everyone knows how much we talk. To guys it might seem typical nonsensical, useless talk, but only girls know how light our heart feels after having discussed about it at great lengths (short talks don’t get us anywhere). And no matter how silly our talks might be, I think all guys should have the patience to hear, as a matter of respect and mere courtesy. We don’t want your comments and neither do we want you to judge us on our ongoing thinking processes, but simply listen. The reward would be yours at the end, which is assured, because she will only love you more for having simply been there.

We are sensitive and emotional, core to the heart and there is no denying that (no matter how strong a girl shows she is, there is one soft corner which always will hurt). And when she gets hurt by something you did unintentionally, you might gain a bonus point for being forgiven. But when the hurt caused is intentional, it tears her into pieces beyond any imagination; and that day you lose all the respect, appreciation and love she had for you.

“Honesty is the best policy”. This is regardless of any gender. Because it’s only when we are honest with the other person, be it a boy or a girl (friend) that trust develops. And a lie sends a default message conveying that you don’t trust the other one enough to have shared the truth.

And I personally feel that it’s not that complex the both genders are made out to be (though I have no experience at all, but still). It is the way we mutually communicate, share and express ourselves that makes the whole process of knowing the other a lot different. And if at all we do like the other, why hide it? Let the other one know. I know it’s not that easy the way it seems to be. Efforts do go a long way to make the guy or a girl stay happy. And these are not the materialistic efforts, but those which come straight from the heart, out of sheer love for the other person!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Write as you can

You might not be Shakespeare,

You might not be Keats,

You might not be expressive enough,

But just write the way you feel!

You might not like to,

You might think you are bad,

You might be pretty hesitant,

Write when you are happy or sad!

And when you write what you feel,

What you wished, for yourself or the other,

The emotions drained on a piece of paper,

Grey, Blue or full of colors!

I’ve seen people write, not often, but occasionally,

And when they do, I see a hidden talent in there,

Only if writing could be a practice,

Putting down the thoughts spontaneously!

The paper then preserves your moods,

Your thoughts so preciously,

Go ahead, do not stop,

For the words you write may shape into a ‘memory’,

The moment, the emotion all captured,

The ones you wrote so honestly!!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The "Lost jewel"

The one I miss,
Is not aware,
The one I hope was really near,
But is so far from my view!

The one I wanted to talk to,
Lasted only for a days so few,
The one I thought was "just the one",
Left like a cool breeze,
In this hot summer sun!

The one I thought had "that magic",
The one who amazed me,
The one, who used the charms in a way,
Like waves he left the shore, leaving me on the bay!

The one who seemed a dream to me,
Perhaps was a dream in reality,
It touched me and kissed me,
And went on its path,
Not knowing the depth it had touched within!

And now I do not know what to do?
For wait is what I can think of,
But a smile on my lips turns the world,
As I reminiscence the moments in the past!

The moments, just a handful,
The one's which coruscate like jewels,
The moments, I 'll hold on,
Whenever I 'll think of you!!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Today is a gift called “PRESENT”

An article in today’s Times Life did left a profound impact on me; and this one which I’ll be writing will be on the same trail of thought!

No wonder, we often keep brooding and regretting over our past and plan about our future with child-like enthusiasm, but caught between the webs of the past and the future, we lose out on the present, a gift given to us by TIME!

I tried enjoying myself while I kneaded the dough today, I appreciated its softness, its texture, the way my fists stiffened the dough, ready to be molded into balls and fried into hot, fluffy puris!
I also enjoyed my bath today. Have you ever enjoyed the way water slips from your body, as if it ‘itself’ enjoyed being on you for few moments and then wished to go on its own path? The scent of the bathing wash, the foam of that wash on the loofah, the wetness of the hair so fragrant that it makes you fall in love with yourself?

I’ve felt this many a times, and it makes me feel that I’m not only pampering myself, but awakening my senses to the mundane things we continue to do every single day of our lives.

So fast is the pace of our lives today, that we are no less than the jugglers in a circus!!
We continue to run, dance on the wheel of life, balancing ourselves so perfectly that we forget that there was no need and no one ever wished us to be “Perfect”!
So whom are we actually trying to oblige and impress?

Caught by the fascination of the cameras on our cell phones, we act like berserk people clicking away pictures with our friends to show off the world on facebook, rather than leaving aside the clicking part and conjuring up the fine lines of the very day, the therapeutic talk with a friend, which our memory has better capacity to treasure it for a lifetime!!

How do you plan to live your life? Mourning over your past, which is full of your mistakes, and embarrassments? Or look at them as “lessons learnt” and read on the PRESENT chapter of your life? As for your future goes, who knows if tomorrow comes or not? Why not live in the present and cherish the gift of every moment? I choose to, do you?

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