‘Grand’-Parents

A friend of mine happened to share with me of how her dadi would encourage her to pursue modeling as she is 5 ft 9 inches tall, how she would ask her sweetly if she has a boyfriend ( and when my friend answered ‘no’, her dadi told her that she would wait for the time to hear the good news, if my friend ever made a boyfriend). Her dadi also encouraged her to volunteer for CWG, saying “Don’t worry about the late night hours, who gets an opportunity to be a part of such historic events again and again?"

And all this while, my mouth was wide opened (not so wide that a fly would come into my mouth:P) and I was amazed! Surprised by the open –mindedness of her dadi, of how she was making herself flow with the currents of ‘today’s time.

Well I don’t know how many of you are aware of what it takes to be open-minded, liberal and graciously accepting and understanding other people’s opinions and views. And coming that from a woman who has seen the world changing, has lived in her ‘own’ times, and in the times of the present is some thing worth acknowledging for!

I myself have no clue of how harsh or nice I will be with my kids, if I’ll be able to bend my line of thought, to match theirs or I’ll be cynical of my children’s ‘ideas –of- having- fun’.Interestingly, my friends pointed out to me, that I’ll be a strict mom with a soft heart, hmmm!!

While these things are too far- fetched to think of, what I feel is having even one elder person in your life, who invites you, unknowingly, to share your story of life with them (every single thing) and understands it just the way you would want them to, at the same time in a polite manner conveys your mistakes and how to be able to correct them, would prove to be nothing less than a jewel found once in a lifetime!

And , I have yet not found that jewel, and perhaps even it if it is suffice to say that there are jewels around me, I somehow have grown up to be intimidated by them, to the extent of not exploring their sheen! Though our ‘best’ friends always form one of the most significant part of our lives, yet an advice of an elderly person, their wisdom which they bestow upon us, sometimes by scolding, and sometimes by gentling pushing us forward to lead the way can be easily compared to an angel in disguise.

This reminds me of my dadu( paternal grandfather) who lived such a simple life, and pampered us to an extent our parents cannot even think of. Every single day when he would come to pick us up from our bus stop, and on our way back to home, we would have ‘bunta’ ( aerated silver, black or orange colored drinks you get in a bottle sealed with the help of a marble). I repeat, Every Single Day. In those years, Coca Cola used to be a litlle expensive for the pocket, so one day he happened to take me and my brother to a shop, to have it, and we were elated and joyous. One thing which I felt guilty about after his demise was how we as kids would run to home, and he would carry our two heavy bags , not saying even a word.

With my dadu every single moment was a treat ( ‘jalsa’ what we call in Punjabi). In the evenings , when we would go to the park to play, he would treat us with orange or mango or raspberry ice lollies ( the very vendors from whom we had these lollies in our growing years, and now detest them for their quality of icecreams, simply coz they did not have a brand!). Sometimes he would make us eat ‘shakargandi’ ( sweet potatoes from the vendor). I hardly recall any request of ours being declined. And, surprisingly, I would not say that we have turned up to be spoilt kids.No, in no respect. And because of the precise reason, my dad too trusts me and my brother when we ask for money, or sometimes rather forget to ask for our pocket moneys. We know the value of money, have never spent extra money for useless stuff ( we have had our share of fun too, shopping, eating with friends or watching movies, but everything comes under a control limit, that we exercise on our own).

I happened to read sometime back, of how parents of today’s generation keep pin pointing their parents not to indulge the little kid in this or that, and on the contrary these grandparents have lived a fuller life in terms of experiences and what not, so they are more experienced in knowing what is right or not. No matter how old they might get, yet the instinct which makes them love, play and indulge their grand children in various activities can in no way be compared to what the parent’s instincts might say.While you might disagree with me on some things ( of course you can), there is still no denying the value which grand parents have in a growing kid’s life.

In praise of the love the grandparents shower on their grand children.

Love you dadu!

Yours

Kriti