Absence

Yellows Vanilla Peoples...the sun is bright and super warm, and I hope the light enters your lives brightening it more than before:) This is the magic of the Winter Sun:):)

So today I join up at Sensational Haiku Wednesday to write a haiku. The prompt she gives us is "Absence". Borrowing the pic from Twisha's awesome blog. Here it goes....:)

Absent so quiet

Piercing silence; recover

Soon enough in time

Friendly Conflicts

Copyright of this picture: Mudasir

It’s been a while since I have been thinking of the number of friends I have around me…Some things have been disturbing, some disappointing and others well they have been considered in plain truth as ‘matter of fact’.

In another few months as I’ll be finishing with my Masters, I’ll have to say even as I know of it now that I didn’t really made any new, so to say wonderful pals in here. My initial months here were a struggle- why oh! why I wanted people to hang out with? Why couldn’t I be happy in my own skin ( and well that is still something I strive to achieve)……perhaps that is why they say being silent is not an easy job, and being silent and choosing silence even when the environment around you is full of hustle bustle is a big thing!

I chose my silences, as I would find my corners in the university campus, sit there when in conflict with my inner emotions or with people around me or simply because of the fact when I had no ‘real’ people around me. They were there, but not really here!

So in that aspect I found myself distancing from a very close friend of mine, both of us who decided to leave the so called prestigious University of Delhi to come here to a new university.

I think ( though I’m not too sure of) that as we grow we just make and meet colleagues, people who share our work space, real friends and true ones are always from the school years.

However, it’s not that I see people not making friends as they enter college or even Masters. Where flowers have to blossom they will, no matter how tiny the space is, so where friends have to be made, you will make, the only factor then shall remain if those friends shall remain long and loyal enough?

I guess this post also comes from the sadness that dwells coz of the fact that being in the same city I haven’t got to meet one of my bestie for some good time. The last I saw her was on her birthday in April, and the other one, well…..sigh…whose birthday I cancelled to go to:/……

I miss them, I truly do, and I don’t know how many friends are in my view. Actually I do. And I’m still to think if I’m a social birdy, an ambivert birdy or one who likes her own silence. The last bit is true from time to time in addition to the space I always cherish to have.

Yes growing up isn’t easy….and yes I don’t wish to answer or find questions to everything…..let time answer them for me. And I hope time shall choose the best time to unravel its answers to me.


I'll end on these lyrics from the song Kya khayal hai from the television series The Dewarists.:

Ik jahan  chota sa apna

Ik jahan tumhara

Muskaan chahe meethi ho

Ya ansoon ik khara

Chalo baant le ghum aur khushi

Thodi guftagoo kar lein

Kaho kya khayal hai…?

I see you

I see you……

Of all the exquisite beauty out there,

One is the one I see through your eyes,

And the other is the one behind pictures I see…………

Of all the effulgent rays that glisten,

On to the gleaming dark green leaves,

The lil dew of love, I see you………….

And of all the naughty smiles of the world,

Eyes that can kill, and fascinate me!

I see you………

In all your simplicity, splendour,

In all your magnificence and beauty,

Shining bright, like a majestic sun,

Playing hide-n- seeks from the peaks……

I see……………………………………………………………you!

Welcoming Winters

Welcoming Winters....

This picture. Copyright: Ryan

 

Oh flakes of snow,

Which in Delhi you don’t show,

Oh! greens and reds,

The sleigh and the chimney puff,

Oh! Lights and Xmas trees,

The carols we used to sing,

The plum cakes I gorge on,

The quilts which I nuzzle in,

The hot milk, the Brandy,

The days without wash,

The warm delicacies,

My fish pakoras wrapped in rumali,

And those days as a kid,

Of going out for chicken soup.

The smart winter uniforms,

The layers of clothes on,

The chilly breeze,

The cold frozen feet,

The hot chick mufflers,

The glistening warm winter sun,

The sitting in verandah,

To soak the warmth within.

Winter days are here again,

And December a pretty month,

On the eve of New Year,

 We cut the cake,

For the joy of the year that comes…….

First Guest Post here:)

Dear Vanilla the Peoples… A very sunshine bright Sunday to you!!. I don’t really have anything to say from my end today, just that my dear Bloggy Friend Kunal’s poem has been lying in my lappy aimlessly for a while. After much pursuing (and banging my head against his questions) he finally agreed to write me a GUEST POST. Yup so this is the first guest post getting featured at Yarn of~ Words. I’m sure you’ll love his work the way I always do... Over to him……                                                

OF HOPES.

Sometimes, it is difficult to think straight.

Sometimes, it is difficult to ‘Decide’.

Sometimes, two hearts do not feel much.

Before, they are about to collide.

                                             Yes, I know what you are saying.

                                              In the beginning even I did not feel ‘that’ way.

                                              Or May be, the heart did skip a beat.

                                              But, I hoped the feeling would go away.

I did saw something in the way you saw me.

I felt something too. A feeling I had to hide.

If only, you had held my gaze a little longer.

I would have listened to myself and sit by your side.

                                               Eyes Speak. Even when the heart says to wait

                                               I ‘had to’ lower my gaze. I knew my eyes will ‘say’

                                               I understand that you understood my doing so.

                                               If not for my past, I would have made your day.

I tried to listen to what you tried to hide.

I hoped you would trust me, waited for you to confide.

I tried, I lied, I cried and finally sighed.

I always kept a check on my emotions, brewing inside.

                                              I somehow feel, you may be the right one.

                                              I keep telling myself, you are here to stay.

                                              Many times, I tried to lighten my heart.

                                              You were my umbrella, when the sky became grey.

I accept things as they are. I do not need any explanation.

You do not have to say much. Just sit beside (me).

I will do everything in my capacity. And beyond.

To give you what you were denied. And protect you from outside.

                                          Heart wants me to trust you. It may eventually will.

                                          I can not promise anything. But be patient. Okay?

                                          The wounds of the past have not healed completely yet.

                                          Stay near. At this point, I hope you will not go astray.

Let there be LIGHT!

This is a pic I clicked at IITF. These magnificent lamps are from TURKEY:)

Hola Vanilla People:) Today I write my third Haiku on 'Light' :) as Leo gives this as a prompt on Haiku Heights

Glimmer you exude

Enlivens me; transforming dark

In you magic dwells

URN.

Yellows Vanilla the peoples:) I'm back...had a wedding in family, so was busy with all the ceremonies. had loads of fun. Today at Haiku Heights, Leo gives us the the prompt as "Urn":)

here is mine:)~~~~~

Urn

Beauty of your curves

Sweet texture of acrylic 

Thy sheer sparkle touch

By way you were held

In the way you hold flowers

 Cherish and love you

I love terracotta pots:) These are some of them

Moments (II)

Dear Vanilla people:) After a period of almost two months, I'm continuing and sharing with you my story, with much apprehension from here. Do get back to the link in case you don't recall where I left.....:)

Her pretty small eyes opened wide as his reply made her heart skip a beat, and then she just brushed away her thoughts, like she would gently do to her hair, but it was not all that same, this time.

She shouted “Hey where are you going?”

“See you at 1 near the café, good day!”

On the Bench. In the mind.

As he threw his bundle of thoughts on the green grass, he tried catching a breath, for it took him a while to find a nice big tree, to handle his weight, in the green lawns.

He chuckled to himself, and then came a soft laugh. And then he laughed thinking how mad he had just been leaving her in the middle of a conversation, only being stupid to run as if he had a train to catch.

Amidst this laughter filled moment, it dawned on him what he had said to her, “I’d rather get lost with you”.

“No, these are not my words” he thought.

“Sure, they are” said another voice in his head.

“You gotta be kidding me? That isn’t true” he thought.

“And what makes you feel that those words were not indubitable?” said the voice.

  And to this he had no answer.

He looked at the flowers in the garden, to see if they had an answer. He then searched the wide blue sky where birds were flying, lost in their own chores of the day. He even looked at the grass, only to see big ants busy gathering food for the winters, but no one was free enough to answer the question he himself had no answer for.

PS: As much as I appreciate positive criticism on the story, it at the same time makes me nervous specially coz being a 'thoughtful' person, dialogues don't come very easily to me:|.....I'll appreciate if you bear my slow progress in writing stories...:)

Love 

Aakriti

IN- SECURITY

Stories of heartbreaks pinch me, coz it scares me if I could ever share "my loyalty" returned with gratitude the very way I'd offer to someone…

Tears of love flowing for a beloved hurt me, coz I wonder if someone will ever love me the way I would, offering my devotion in eternal love……

And the mystical beauty I imagine my love to enrapture, embraces me, day and night, that’s what I live with……

Until I find that someone with whom insecurity would become…IN-SECURITY!

Love Aria's blog and her pictures:)

Aakriti

My first ever HAIKU

Yellows Vanilla People:):) hope you are doing fabulously awesome. Haikus have always been intriguing to me. it seemed like a kind of Jigsaw puzzle, or rather a maths problem to me so far, until Leo ( Vinay) helped me today with writing a haiku..

HAIKU: Is a Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.. If its emotions and life involved, its a senryu.


Alright...before you go ahead to read what I wrote..here are the ways of understanding a syllable- lets take my name for example.. Aakriti...you break it into sounds.. so it becomes three syllables Aa- kri- ti. 
Other examples:)
hon-ey ( 2 syllables), beau-ty ( again...2 syllables), ap-ple (2) mis-un-der-stand-ing (5 syllables)


As a first timer Leo tells me that it's tough to figure out syllables. So well I wrote my very first Haiku with his help, on the topic of Obsession which Leo has posted on this blog of his..Here is my Haiku:~

I think of murder

That I had done last moonlight

The thought comes again 

To help understand the syllables...it goes like:

I think of mur-der ( 5 syllables)

That I had done last moon-light ( 7 syllables)

The thought comes again ( 5 syllables)

I also got to know that if any kind of break needs to be given in between lines, it should come in the second line and the first line and the first part of a second line needs to be connected, and subsequently, the second part of the second line and the third line needs to be connected.. if it seems gibberish to u~ Chk out Leo's haiku on Kindness:)


PS: This above info was for those who are CLUELESS how to read Haiku...other awesome Vanilla people just ignore:)
.

Greatful for...troubled moments

Sunday mornings are blissful, one reason being the weekly gift I get with my full doze of “The Speaking Tree” newspaper.

SO well, as I picked up the newspaper today, the very first quote reached right into me, my inner layers of consciousness and the quote goes like:

“ Deep doubts, deep wisdom. Small doubts, little wisdom”~ A Chinese Proverb

I have been sailing through the waters of life at the deeper end, and I do hope that I get and find my wisdom from all that every troubling moment has to offer.

So, this week I guess I’m greatful for:

·         My anxiety filled panic attacks ( gosh..never did I thought they’d be on my list of being greatful for)….for I hope they’ll at the same time touch the inner soul of mine~ leading me to a glorious path filled with millions of sunshine smiles…J

·         And my dear ones for being there with me alwaysJ

Join up at Maxabella’s space to feel greatful and blissful ;)

Have a GREAT DAY!!

AAKRITI

Khamoshiyan

Khamoshiyan

Yeh waqt hai kuch khamoshiyon ka,

Jo chuppi si banayi baitheen hain,

Yeh waqt hai un uljhanon ka,

Jo bina uljhe na samajh mein ani hain,

Yeh waqt hai kuch sawalon ka,

Jinke jawaab na hasil aasani se,

Yeh waqt hai kuch faslon ka,

Jinke rishte na kachche dhage hain….

Is waqt mein hai yeh khamoshi,

Har ek ne jo mano sajaai hai,

Kuch zaroori, toh kuch bewajah,

Akhir yeh wajah bhi satati hai……

Khamoshi yeh humari hai,

Khamoshi jo tumhari hai…….

Aakriti

Busting Myths on Psychology

What is Psychology?

Heyloz Vanilla peopleJ Time for some en-lighten-ment!!

Well, it’s been a while since I have been thinking of writing a post that should have been written long time back. But when it has to be- it has to be! So here it goes…

After having spent some 6 years in the field of Psychology, and some more to go..I would like to clear some airs as to what Psychology is and is ‘not’!

MYTH

  1. People in the profession of Psychology or psychologists can read YOUR MIND:

FACT: Let’s start with the students. We, as novices are in no position to read your minds. And when I say that -I’m VERY VERY SERIOUS! We are no psychics (psychics are people who can see the future, so next time you use this word for us, just be a lil enlightened!;) Also, while we do deal with overt ( outer) and covert (inner) behaviour of an individual, it takes years of practice before we can actually understand what is there in the person’s mind. READ –  I use the word “understand” not that we can begin to see through the other’s mind! So in short, we are no mind readers, we are no x-ray machines who can look through your skull, then through your brain and then tell you “Woaa!! Don’t you idiot lie to me, I know what’s going in your mind” – (This even non- Psychology people can do :D!!)

To be honest that would be the last thing I would ever want to happen to me! Simply coz my own myriads of thoughts are crazy enough, and I would not want a million others to come haunting me!

MYTH

2.      Psychology is about ‘only’ mind.

FACT: No doubt Psychology is about mind, and precisely I won’t call it a myth, but it is important to know that just like everything in this world is inter-connected, similarly mind being the centre of everything is linked to many aspects. So, in Psychology we study everything about human behaviour. Hence, many fields like- social psychology       ( where we study the individual in social situations), forensic psychology, criminal psychology ( here are all the cases of ‘Plea for insanity’ and the likes dealt, so the movie Silence of the Lambs, and Sydney Sheldon’s book ‘Tell Me Your Dreams’ fall under this category), then we have sports psychology, Organisational Behavioral Psychology            ( where we have professionals in Psychology dealing in the HR departments of MNC’S trying to work on areas like work motivation, leadership, team building activities etc.), Indian Psychology ( An upcoming area where we study Yoga, Vedas, Spirituality, Meditation and how they affect the human) and many more..

There is no end to it, precisely coz human behaviour is complex, and so even a zillion kinds of Psychology wouldn’t suffice to understand it.

MYTH

3.      Psychologists are of NO VALUE

 FACT: Now this is one serious accusation on the millions of people working in the area of Psychology, researching on the various ways a child learns something or for that matter how neurons respond similarly to emotions like anger and fear.

 Just like any other profession which has a value, Psychology contributes immensely to almost all spheres of life.

F.Y.I. the parents of Psychology are – Philosophy and Physiology. Philosophy Yup, the mom and dad are indeed big shots in themselves!!;) Thus the wide influence of Psychology!

MYTH

4.      Psychologists are same as Psychiatrists

 FACT: Door door tak nahi!! Kadapi nahiii!! These are two different professions. So here is the gyaan: Psychologists are people who do their Bachelors, Masters, M.Phil or Phd. in fields related to Psychology. Yes. There is a field called “Clinical Psychology” which deals with mental illnesses. Psychologists precisely deal with giving therapies to clients and patients from the normal everyday problems to the gravest illnesses. (More on this some other timeJ )

Psychiatrists are people who have done their MBBS and then their MD in Psychiatry. These are doctors by professions and have the authority to prescribe medicines to the patients unlike Psychologists.

In the contemporary times, a combination of psychiatry and psychology works best in favour of the patient, where along with taking the medicine, the patient also undergoes therapy so as to help him her overcome his/ her illness.

MYTH

5.      Girls studying Psychology are very ‘chant’ (to translate: clever) so one should BE-WARE of them, and people studying Psychology are NOT liable to make any mistakes!!

 Again…I beg people not to think that we cannot make mistakes. So, more often than not I hear people starting their sentences like “You being a Psychology student should know this…or that…” and then “Psychology padh rahi ho, doosron ki psychology ko samjhs karo!) { Yes! Sure..As you say! Don’t you know I’m free of all the emotions and thoughts which the Lord only bestowed upon non- psychology people!}.

As far as being clever goes, I really don’t know what to say on this. To consider temporally, times have changed, gone are the days when people would be innocent and honest. I guess, unfortunately, the 21^st century and the  years to come will be about self, and only self, snatch, cheat, betray, stab, unless wise people like us go beyond them and cherish the values which our forefathers had bestowed upon us, through the generations!

This much basic should suffice for now. If you have any other questions, feel free to throw them at me, and I shall try and catch them and send the ball rolling back to you, that which glows;) with a better understanding!

Be enlightened. Be Blessed.

Aakriti 


P.S.:  To share with you all Vanilla ppl..me and my frnd got so frustrated by the constant comments we would get as Psychology students that we made a grp on FB which said "Studying Psychology doesn't makes me a mind reader" :P...;)

A Blue Daze

Out of the blue, very randomly, she ended up going to Goa with her dad for a few days. Well, that was not what she had thought it would happen, for she longed to go there and have some wild fun with friends. And here she was, but, with her dad who had come here for some work. She didn’t really mind much, for it was a welcome change from her hectic college life.

Sitting in the lobby of a gorgeous hotel where one end faced the blue waves, she sat on a cane chair, flipping through the glossy, dreamy pictures of the ‘Inside Outside’ magazine, the kinds she had always loved, for who would not dream of having a décor like the ones she saw in these pictures. Funky, colourful, elegant, charming and everything in one.

As she finished her magazine, her eyes turned to a cute little eight year old boy who was playing around in the lobby. She looked at him, waved him a high and shined her pretty sweet smile onto him. He looked at her through his naughty eyes and then went about running around aimlessly in a funny way in and around the lobby.

Indeed it was a fun area to hang out. Just outside the lobby on the right end, one could see through the long windows an area given to sitting and relaxing as the seats were made up of wooden logs with sand at one end and long vases all in blue kept together with a dash of sea shells. So well, since she was idle and had nothing to do, she called the little boy and planned a game with him. She had no clue what they were up to, but yes it was fun!

“So, you like the idea of playing a game?”

“Sounds good to me”.

“Hey, but tell me whom are you here with?”

“ Oh, don’t you worry, he is busy right now”

“Great”

“Before we start playing, tell me, what’s your name?”

“Ashish and yours?”

“Aanvi”

Both of them weaved stories around the vases, the shells and how dolphins would come there every day and leave their secrets at the corner of this place. It ended up being pretty mesmerizing.

Just when they had got tired of running around and creating their magical castles, as she faced Ashish, she only turned her head to see a tall guy in mid twenties with a nice build almost a look alike of Hercules, the game she would play on her desktop as a teen.

“Wait, am I dreaming?.....How can someone be so good looking?”

“Hey Ashi, whats up?”

“Bhaiya, I was playing with Aanvi didi and we had a lot of fun”.

She excused herself from coming in between the two of them and greeted him with a silly smile of hers.

“Hi Aanvi, I’m Vivaan”

“Hi”

She had no clue what to say next, for how could she, as it would happen more often than not  that a good looking guy would make her go weak in the knees and no matter how much her heart wanted to give him a thousand glances again, she could just not gather her guts to go ahead with it. Just as she was thinking what to speak next,

He said “Thank you so much for keeping Ashish busy, I really thank you”.

“Umm, well, you needn’t thank me that much, the best thing two idle people could do was utilise their time together and have some fun, so that’s what we did, right Ashish?” She patted him as she winked at him.

“ So what gives you a reason to be idle in such a beautiful place like Goa?”

“Oh! My dad is here for a meeting, and since I could spare a few days off too, I thought it would be a nice change from college to come by here”.

“So your father was in the conference room with us?”

After a little thinking she said “Well, yes then, I guess”.

“Would you like to have a cup of coffee together while Ashi goes off to sleep in the room?”

“This was astounding, how could he… did I just hear what he said, or am I hearing sweet auditory hallucinations?”

She remained quiet for few minutes as he looked at her expectantly for an answer.

“Aanvi?”

“Yes?”

“Alright then, give me a few minutes; I’ll come in a while”.

“He took my question for an answer?....What is happening” thought she.

“If I go with him, then how will I tell dad where am I” She thought.

“ So you ready?”

She got startled and asked him:

“At what time the meeting will end?”

“Still three hours to go including the break they’ll give in between”.

She asked him to wait for few minutes and rushed to the room to a slip on a pair of ballerinas with the dress she wore and looked at her face in the mirror.

“ I think I look reasonably good. Sure? Ok? FYI…. He is waiting!!” she talked with herself in the mirror and closed the door behind her as she rushed to the elevator.

In the meanwhile she texted her dad that she was busy, and told him not to worry about anything.

As she came out from the elevator and took the stairs down the lobby, he saw her descend in a very fairylike fashion. That was when they both caught a good glimpse of the other and she finally got to see him properly.

He had small eyes, long face, sharp nose and sharp jaw line and to top it up he had a goatee, which she always told her brother to have. His complexion was a dusky one and then his tall height spoke for his impressive personality. He spoke well too, if only he could have had a more to- fall- for voice she liked to hear, but well everything is not present everywhere and she was wishing for perfection!

She still couldn’t believe, but she went with the flow, for guys like these only showed up in Mills and Boons or other romantic novellas and novels.

She hardly talked at the coffee table and like a shy child answered only to questions he asked.

“This guy is a talkative one, or is it that I have a lot to talk about, but just can’t speak?”

Randomly, not knowing what he was talking, she asked:

“So how come Ashi is here with you?”

“Huh?”

“Where did this come from?”

“Oh! This was random, sorry” She answered sheepishly.

He smiled at her and said “It’s alright, no apologies”.

“Well, I stay in Bombay and had dropped by at my brother’s place for a day, when Ashi, whose vacations are currently on, heard that I’m going to Goa, he incessantly began chanting that he had to come along with me. I told him that I was coming here for work, but hell he was adamant. So here he is with me, until he found you this morning”.

“Hmm”

“And how come you got free from the meeting that early?”

“My job got over, so thanks to that” he answered back smilingly.

“ Tell me something, is Ashi imagining the stories he shared with me, the ones you narrated to him or do you actually talk?” he asked her naughtily.

No guy had ever said this to her in such a cute fashion. Firstly, coz she had hardly ever met them so spontaneously and secondly she did talk, a lot!

She smiled at him, this time managing to look and dip into his deep dark eyes. Their eyes struck together like two ends of a ribbon getting tied to form a beautiful bow, but the moment she realized this, she quickly gazed her eyes on the coffee at the table and began to look around.

After a while as they finished their coffee, it was now the moment when the bill had to be paid.

And just then she uttered unknowingly “Oh! Damn, I forgot my wallet in the room!”

He looked at her surprisingly and said “Ma’am, do you really think you should be saying this when there is a guy, I think pretty decent looking, happy to have shared a cup of coffee with you?”

Yes his reply melted her heart like a bar of dark chocolate ready to be licked. She was left speechless.

As they walked together to the lobby, she thanked him and walked towards the beach.

Later all she recalled: