THE DIFFERENT VOICES IN MY HEAD….

Heloz to everyone there. Hope you doing well. Before you start thinking from the title of this post that I have Dissociative Identity Disorder (earlier known as Multiple Personality Disorder), let me clear all the airs. Or rather wait for a while and you’ll know it for yourself why this post has been titled as that.

Since quite some time, I have been perturbed about issues of maintaining good, healthy social relationships. I don’t know if you consider this as a topic of interest even worth reading, but for me relationships matter a lot (not only in reality, but also when it comes to figuring out what they are, their nature, content and so much more).

Some of the things I’ve been hearing from my friends are:

1. People these days are not trustworthy, so BE ON YOUR GUARD. Start from NOT trusting them, and when you think they have done something to win your trust, that is when perhaps you can go ahead and ‘trust’ them. (It’s like giving a trust an entire new definition, that which belongs to the ‘today’s GENX’!)
2. It takes a good amount of skill to handle social relationships. It is an art. (And just when I begin to appreciate my friend for the way she handles things and people, she becomes modest and tells me ‘it’s all in the name of experience’- Sad I don’t have much of it you see :/).
3. And then there are others who tell you, that ‘all are not the same’, see for yourself and you’ll get to know..blah blah. (Thank you! this is one of the basics I learnt in Psychology- that individual differences exist!).

And now the voices which have been dancing in my head, making it difficult for not only me but perhaps for those around me to figure out what ‘I’m actually up to?’

I wish it was easy to explain, but I’ll try my best. One part of the voice which I hear is which keeps telling me NOT to trust people, the other part tells me that people are not actually bad and then I bump into this third one in the newspaper today…and here it goes :

“Live more authentically. Drop the masks; they are a weight on your heart. Be exposed. Of course it is going to be troublesome but that trouble is worth it because only after that trouble will you grow and become mature. And then nothing is holding life. Each moment life reveals its newness. It is a constant miracle happening all around you says Osho.”

While I could write a good number of words on this thought itself, but I’ll refrain from doing so. The matter of concern right now comes down to a conflicting situation: Should one be an open book, like the way Osho says ‘expose yourself, and drop your masks’ or should one wear masks, portraying a different self with different people? ( Some of you might think that what Osho is saying might not be akin to being an open book, but that is what I think of it to be for the time being- You see moment to moment our perspectives might mould in different shapes).

All I know is that I haven’t ever tried buying masks leave alone wearing them! I’m what I’m ( haha Reebok’s liner) and yes that is true. But surely this doesn’t apply to everyone around me. There will be people who often go to the Masks Market, to sell their old ones in order to buy the new and the latest ones, or there may be those who have been wearing the same mask for years, unable for you to identify the real side of them (so that mask is what you take it to be as real!).

Why I’m talking about all this is because there is this third voice in there too, that which is pure, that which is ‘my own’, which you might term as my gut feeling or what my instinct says. Now the cynical aspect comes in when these very people will give you a good nice so called ‘advice’ and then go on to say “But in the end do what your heart says”. Oh! Sure, as if all this talk of yours left that little pure bit in my heart as pure. Even my purest piece of heart gets all saddened by the impurities around it and says “Ah! Great, is there any area in here for me to live?”

What happens to me eventually? I get all entangled it the threads of the social obligations (being nice to people, don’t stop talking to them right away because you never know when you might need them, they are your elders, so respect them no matter what they say to you and the list goes on….) I hope you do realize my situation and its perspective too. And then I think that are social relations all about selfishness, fakeness? Is there no space for pure exchange of emotions, where you can be yourself? So every time you step out of your home sweet home, you inevitably are wearing a mask even though you are oblivious to that fact?

Oh dear!! I wish life wouldn’t have been this complex. The vicious circle of whom to trust and whom not to trust will takes it course to us being hurt if we become too friendly, or rather our ‘very own self’ with that person. And who is the cause of that hurt? Oh not the other person, you see, it’s YOU!! (Yeah…because your friend told you not to trust and you went too far, oh don’t you shed your tears now ok?)

This and the network of threads which are intertwined with these make social living a hell carved out from the heaven (what it used to be at one time). And the fact is that with the technology and the advancement happening around us in every nanosecond, things are only getting more confusing and complex. (If not for you, but at least for me)

Signing off with a HOPE and a BELIEF that the threads shall get untangled some day and that people will continue to be nice and good the way I have thought of them to be!!

Let Hope never die

This poem was an afterthought after watching the movie the Shawshank Redemption. Heart touching, instilling, sad yet bright and cheerful…after all is that not our life too is about?

As I read the “Man’s search for meaning”,

By a man called Frankl, simple yet great,

And by a movie so touching and lively,

A hope that instilled the soul,

The redemption from the Shawshank,

The freedom, the liberation,

All lived on HOPE,

A spirit to strive for,

To live life to the core.

How we as individuals,

Get saddened, depressed and weak,

It’s only when life hits us hard,

We realize our deep strengths indeed,

For the gloominess that in moments does surround,

Leaves a glimmer of Hope deep down,

It may take months or even years,

But the hope does its work, to bring some cheer,

To live up to its name sans any fear!

Like a silver lining,

Like a shiny sun after the rain,

Hope instills life as it gives pain,

And for all that is to come,

I too have given a name,

To a secret diary of mine,

To which "HOPE", I have named!!

My watched steps

No matter how I wish to express,

The way I always do,

I see others respond to what you say and do,

I wish to say what I feel,

Words from my heart to you,

But something stops me,

I don’t know what it is, nor do I have a clue!

The space which you give me, when around,

Seems all closed when others surround,

Apprehension, inhibition force me to back out,

And I’m left feeling helpless,

I say what I don’t wish to!

How absurd this society is,

Making us do what we had never wished to,

Caught in the webs of relations and obligations,

We hate those who love us,

And whom we hate we tend to woo!

As I watch my steps,

Unaware who they listen to,

Me, my inner voice or the society?

The latter we made ourselves,

Not to lead, but to follow!

If ever I feel reticent,

And you sense the awkwardness in me,

When the ‘world’ is gone, and alone we stand,

Freely ask what I had to say,

And in my eyes you had seen,

Perhaps then I may not recall,

If I was frustrated, anxious or angry,

Just give me a hug filled with sweet warmth,

And let me erase all memories!

KUCH SAWAAL

Dear All, this is my very first attempt with hindi poetry, and I'm very nervous and anxious at how this will be received.

A sudden thought of how I used to write hindi led me to write a poem in hindi too. So here it goes( Fingers crossed)...

Yeh zindagi ki dastan,

Ek ajeeb paheli hai.

Yeh rishte jo pal mein bante,

Pal mein tootte, jaise do saheli hain.

Jab doori chahi, toh nazdeek bulakar,

Ghamon ko bandhe, jaise ek kone mein,

Aur jab paas aana chaha,

Toh mano waqt hi ho gaya (jaise paraya).

Lamhein bhi ajeeb khel hain,

Jis raftaar par badalte,

Usi par chalkar door hote hain.

Prashn par prashn tang karte hain,

Yeh bhi zindagi ka chakkar chalte hain.

Jo jawaab mile, milte hi kho jate hain,

Is luka chuppi ke khel mein,

Hum na jeette na harte hain.

Abhi toh jeena shuru kiya hai,

Is bhaag daur ke khel mein,

Abhi toh shararat chooti hai,

Is zindadil dil mein.

Kyun na karun sawaal?

Yeh zindagi meri hai,

Kheloongi woh bhi magn hokar,

Kya hua, agar paheli hai?

WHO BAKES A CAKE ON THEIR OWN BIRTHDAY??

The other day as I surfed through blogs, I happened to see one blog in which the girl had made a list of certain things, one of the points read as “Who bakes a cake on their own birthday??” The way that girl said it felt as if she was saddened by the fact that none of her friends baked a cake for her or got it for her on her B -day!!

This made me thinking. I thought that till date no one had ever baked a cake for me on my birthday (my mom didn't know how to bake, and my friends who do know never baked a cake for me or for that matter got it for me). But even before this thought could sadden me, it vanished as it came!! You know why?? It is because

THIS TIME...

This time don’t stop me from going,

‘Coz I really do need a break.

This time don’t say nice words,

‘Coz you’ll melt my heart again.

This time let love beckon you,

As your heart wishes to follow.

This time I’ll take some steps back,

Though my heart does feel hollow.

This time I’ll find myself,

My friends, whom I forgot.

This time don’t ask any questions,

Why we cared and why we fought?

This time I’ll smile as I cry,

For I forgot the distance as we met.

This time I’ll be “me” again,

Like on seashore the grains were left!!

Fussball (Football) Fever

I really do not know how to start. And this time I’m very very serious, not because I have loads of thoughts on my mind that I do not know where to start, this time it is much the opposite.

I’ve been seeing since few years how keenly my brother watches Foot ball matches, how lovingly and passionately the town, the city and countries come to life whenever FIFA WORLD CUP happens.

And I have always wondered what is there in football that brings people from different countries together. A friend of mine who plays football and is a wild fan of Manchester United ( GGMU!!) responds to this question of mine by saying that the passion, the drive that is there in this game is something you cannot see in any other game. I asked him that this game is so ‘rough’, players go around shoving each other to take the ball?? And to that he replied that it is the ardor, obsession and the fervor, the urge to make your country proud by every move of yours, by every goal you make and players who are playing in the World Cup are there for a purpose. Indeed, yes!

Over the years all I have praised this game is for (except for the awesome goals that were made) it’s cute and hot players. Sorry, but it was something which I shared with you very honestly. I have absolutely no clue about this game. I do not know what all tricks the players use, why and when Red, Yellow cards are given (though I do know they are given when the player misbehaves), and am completely unaware of the rules.

Every time I asked my brother to tell me the rules, he would tell me “later” and that later hasn’t arrived till date.

Moreover (I’m sorry this might be very disappointing to read) but I have no idea about the names of the teams, have heard a few like Arsenal, Chelsea, Manchester United. That’s it. I don’t even know the names of the players except for a few.

My brother and I watched few months back the movie Goal and Goal2 and I loved both of them. Thanks to him I love the ads of Puma, Adidas, Nike, and Reebok which casts lead Football players having fun.

The enthusiasm, the zest with which people cheer for teams is something which I do not connect to, and feel sad about. And now I do not know if I can be made to or rather make myself fall in love with this game, or even after years when I re-read this I’ll still be feeling sad that I know nothing about the game, its players nor about its team, except for knowing where the next Fifa World Cup is gonna happen.

Before I end this I would like to share what made me write this post in the very first place. It was the ‘echo’, the true feel of the song ‘The Waving Flag’ by Kannan that made me think of a huge football ground with spectators cheering for their teams, and everywhere you look around all you see is anger, drive, energy, passion, and craze of the football fans for their country and for their teams.

No wonder then that FOOTBALL the most loved and followed game in most of the countries!!!:)

MY QUESTION

Do you understand how much it takes?
To give a portion of my heart out to you?

Not in piece, I’ll bleed,
But in space, I tell you!

What’s in a piece, tell me?
I gave you a room, a private suite,

You stayed for a good time,
Enjoying the luxuries,

Soon you might get bored,
And tell me I got to leave”,

The empty space, the talking corners,
The joyous lights, the charm of a visitor,
All will be gone, to make it lifeless.

A heart is not a hotel,
A room where anyone can enter,
A heart is a place very sacred,
You earn a space to live in there,

And if at all you didn’t value,
All the talks ‘the heart’ did,
If you thought, one day,
You’ll go just the way you came,
My heart might with sorrow,
For sure would immensely pain.

It’s strange, it a gave a space,
To a ‘stranger’, one unknown,
And now it’s helpless,
‘Coz it’s too late,
To back out to create a filter.

Don’t tell me when you’ll leave,
Or should I say, leave a note?
It’ll be better to not have a memory,
What’s the point, once you’ll be gone?

Like before, my heart will cry,
Might ache and bleed to the core,
But time is a great healer,
With time, the wound shall mature.

The way I attached myself to thee,
I know not how it happened?

And I’m not an analyst like you!
To dig deep and find answers from clues.

Am I blessed to have found you?
Or scared enough that you might leave?

If I don’t see you again,
I’ll preserve the moments,
And forever shall, in safe, keep!!

THE SOCIAL NETWORK

Woah!! It’s gonna be three years since I joined “Facebook”, earlier known as “THE facebook”, THE “THE” removed only because of a guy whom the best friend thought wasn’t wise enough to be invested in.

Hi. Welcome to the “SOCIAL” NETWORK review from my side!! And though all these months what I’ve been doing is reviewing nothing but readings given to me weekly in my college, I was more than anxious for the movie to get over and write my thoughts, oops! POST my thoughts on my very own “blog” ( HA! THANK goodness I’m not an obsessive blogger like Mark Zuckerberg was).

No one but I know at this moment what my mind is going through. I liked the movie, no wonder it’s worth getting all the awards at most prestigious award functions (I’m intentionally trying NOT to name them). But the main reason for the success is the movie will be what? The way the movie was made? Or the way events and incidents happened in Zuckerberg’s life?

It’s been many years since I’ve been reading “The Chicken Soup” and in my teen years and even now I often wonder that the issues ( that of “stereotyping” “ self- esteem” “ being a nobody” “ having no girlfriend or for that matter friends to talk to” in short everything that can be included in the SOCIAL CONTEXT of a school life) which bothered teens in the west were far more different than in the “Indian” context. Now I do not know if I’ll be right when I say that “back- bitching”, “gossiping”, “publicizing”, “flaunting”, “popularizing” have all resulted in India from THE FACEBOOK, or they were already there (you might as well disagree, but I’m purposely not elaborating it at this moment, coz indeed there are many factors for the westernization of the Indian culture, and FB might be just one of them).

Surely some people would agree with me that the teens of today’s generation are light years ahead in the negative things that they are indulging in, unknowingly or perhaps knowingly too) from where we were at their age and are now. The other day I heard my aunt saying about her son, who just recently joined facebook, “What’s the idea of going to the school, and coming back, sitting in front of FB only to chat and talk with friends whom you just left few hours before”? Height was when my cousin in the ninth standard was on his Homepage and told me that his classmates would sneakily get digicams or cells to click pix in the school only to go back home and upload on facebeook.

Sorry for digressing (as I said I had too many thoughts on my mind). The story of the facebook founder- Mark, if I believe it to be at least 75% true as shown in the movie then this is all I would like to share ( and perhaps even if not, then too):
What do you think about the aspect of friendship as shown in the movie? TO BE CRISP I’LL SAY: BEST FRIENDS always think good for you. It’s sad that trivial jealousies as friends move ahead on the ladder of success whether in the high school life or in professional life take over the wonderful moments one shared with that friend. This is precisely what Zuckerberg did. HA! What an irony, the guy who created FB had not even a single friend on his side, as every second online people added each other, made friends and so to say expanded their “social” network.
What happened in the end? His friend was right about his partner who dealt with drugs and was caught red- handed for it.

What about the glorification of excessive “blogging” and open expression of your emotions? As is said that all geniuses have a streak of madness in them, so did Zuckerberg! The anger, the rage, the wildness, the inability to take control of one’s emotions is what drove him to do all that he did in the very first place. While all we friends might be very glad to be “connected” and share videos, pictures, and what not on FB. It is the founder’s story that hit me hard. I felt sorry, pathetic and was angry at him for what he did. (Taking all his anger out on his girlfriend whom he was dating and “openly” abusing her and posting it on his blog, and going ahead to create facemash.com only to humiliate a person to the extent that you forget that at the end of the day you are a human being, not a wild hound who would kill his own kids for hunger).

And all that while you take undue advantage of your best friend’s TRUST in you, only by throwing him out of your company, he being oblivious of all your strategies. A BEST FRIEND STABBING AT YOUR BACK IS THE WORST WOUND ONE CAN EVER GET. Mark was a coward! Not only did he cheat others, but he cheated himself more than anyone in the process of becoming a billionaire. Keeping his genius all aside, I would like to pose a question: What value does money holds in one’s life? And what does holding on to grudges for no reason at all lead to? I’ll tell you- LOSING your “very “own strengths you had in the form of your friends!

The movie is a success, and I’ll be only reiterating this word! But it’s heartrending, sad, depressing to see everything that happened in his life. The creation of facebook has been a revolution in itself. Like that day a kid of 5 year old telling me “Didi, are you on facebook? I answer him by saying yes, his answer only leaves my wide open as he happily says “Add me on facebook”!

So here it goes:
If you wish to meet new people,
If you wish to make random friends,
There are loads ideal out there,
Just “add” them, don’t comprehend,
If you wish to publicize or wish to popularize,
Go click on facebook, make a profile,
The world was no less in abnormalities,
Now only it’s leading to some new,
Where boyfriends get a heart attack,
When their girlfriends find new ones to hook,
The anxiety that is overwhelming,
When your party is poorer than hers,
The tension that your boyfriend is cheating,
As on his profile you constantly gawk,
The narcissicism it feeds into your soul,
Making you a star every moment,
Oh! Wake up and answer your call,
Not studying, would later help you lament,
Your teacher will question you,
“I knew you were facebooking”,
And to her you’ll give a silly nod,
Expecting her to be understanding!

It’s ended the “real” social life,
As couch potatoes sit in front of their pcs,
It’s boring after awhile,
Seeing people’s changing faces!
While you still maybe “quizzing”,
Or chatting with “21” friends online,
Ask, answer to yourself,
Are all those people really your “friends”?
Changing realities won’t change the truth,
Your best ones will stay closer than your kin,
The ones whom you greet and talk to,
Are the ones behind you places switch?

While jokes keep cracking now and then,
There is a real danger,
To us, to families, and to their children,
Who stick like a leech with their computers?
And as I write this long poem,
Lamenting and feeling sad,
I myself am part of it,
I wish I hadn’t been,
But I’m glad for some things,
More depressed for others,
As there was the mastermind “making” social relations,
A consequence of not having his best friend near!!


PS: After a wonderful talk with a friend, which served as a stress buster, I do agree that in the end nothing can destroy us, and its in our own hands what we wish to do, whether its facebooking people, or staying "actually" connected with them.

PACE

If only life didn’t run at this pace,

Forcing us to believe this ‘reality’,

No one knowing the truth

Everyone succumbs to the fallacies,

And yet we continue to believe,

That fantasies and realities are apart,

The mysteries of a labyrinth,

A spiral shape, no end, no start.

Chaos exists everywhere,

Like particles of dust scattered,

Waiting for the light to reflect,

The quantities of this particulate matter,

The disturbance settles in piecemeal,

Like few silences in a thunderstorm,

Mortifying the happy moments,

And trampling on them like left away stones.

Had I had all the time in my hand,

And money to spend with freedom,

With my wonderful friends,

I’d spend each day like a vacation,

But works keeps us going,

Being idle is dangerous too,

We crib, we cry, and get distressed,

A life which we live

At times, seems nothing beyond a mess.

What’s the point if I go on and on?

Had things had to change,

They would have, in the time now gone,

Moments of all flavours,

We can’t choose, but given to taste,

The bitterness of some, so dull,

The sweetness of some, we praise.

Repose and spread your arms,

Like wings, and feel the breeze,

It may seem cold and sultry,

But shall in moments your heart reach.

A bond with a picture...

There are times when lyrics of a song do justice to your emotions, there are times when even an instrumental music speaks to you exactly the way you feel at that moment, it brings tears of joy or sadness, or simply memories you cherished or wish to forget.
this time it was a picture for me which I found here while going through the pictures. This picture made an instant connect with my 'present' state of affect...here it goes..

This picture you see here speaks a lot the way I ‘m feeling right now. A dab of blue in the background, good portions of yellow ( lowlessness- yeah I just made a word) and seldom reds to signify there exists a 'life' in me.

Even if you wish to see the true colors of me,

At the moment, you may not see,

I’m all stressed up coz of work,

The yellow with reds wishes to spurt,

But is overpowered by blue, the color of the sea.

And as I try hard to change the hues,

The texture remains the same,

The waves of the ocean on a ‘low’ tide,

Create havoc as they rise again.

But my fellow tulips tell me,

There isn’t much to lose,

The winter will soon end,

Giving way to magnificence of the spring,

And all the days shall not be that gloomy,

As there will be sun to love ‘me’.

And with this hope,

I wait for the days,

(Keenly and enthusiastically, in my heart)

When I shall jump like a kid,

And like a fountain twist and dance.

For now, instill the calmness,

Of the oceans and the seas,

I need the moon for beauty and serenity,

Peace is what I wish for,

As the commotion is too hard to handle,

Oh! dear blue,

Fade away, like a miracle!!

OVER AND AGAIN

I’m tired of telling you,

Over and again,

Of how you speak and talk,

Once, twice, I didn’t mind,

But it’s time it gets a li’l sort(ed).

I hope you realize what a ‘sorry’ means,

For you consciously swear not to repeat it again,

But, sadly, it’s not only you, but all,

Who say it and do it again!

I might be a hypocrite as I write these words,

Knowing I’m not too perfect to tell,

Yet I’ll share, that words that we pick,

Have immense potential,

To hate, to kill, and to foretell.

Knowing that we value,

The other person we have,

Knowing how it hurts,

Whenever we are too ‘frank’,

Knowing it all,

We still tread that path,

Repeating the mistakes,

That might ‘forever’ shall last.

How often can one be forgiven?

No matter we continue to live and to love (them),

And the reason we only hate them,

Is ‘coz of the ways that they cannot amends.

Let them “Be”

As I step into this new world of mine everyday with a beautiful smile, expecting things and people to be kind, wishing the day to be more than just ‘fine’, all I view is the beauty in them. Until a few moments before a nice friend of mine brought me face- to face with ‘reality’ of what these people are and how I think them to be (as some ‘good’ people with whom I spend my working hours.

I do not regret having smiled at them, nor do I regret having helped them or having shared a joke with them. And even if at the end of the day I do get to know that they wish to talk some bad stuff about me, and stop themselves because of the fact that someone close to me is there, who might inform me, I do not wish to care, but I also do care (Why do you think then I’m writing this?)

In moments like these, I as a person only wish to learn from my friends (two wonderful ones) who have only given love and kindness in return of all the hatred, disgust, humiliation they got from a familial or a friendly end. So now the question is who am I then to lock my kindness, my generosity, and my friendliness in my heart; for these beautiful traits might just get rotten and stale if I keep them inside me instead of spreading them to people who might in turn learn from them or if nothing else benefit in some or the other way.

I, in my complete senses. am aware of the fact how genuine, honest and frank a person am I. I also know that in today’s time, of the billion population of ours perhaps only good handfuls are left who might be included in this category. Like the Zeitgeist ( the spirit of the times), moreover today’s parents might no more teach their child to be honest, good and true to others, instead qualities like malice, vengeance, tactfulness are ‘in’ and one can only with the help of these traits climb the ladder to success. Good for those who posses them and for those who teach them too, and lucky are those who might have them innately! ( This was just a satire, I do not intend to generalize).

Doing good to others, and emitting warmth, love and kindness to people around you regardless of what they are makes us feel more appreciative of the kind of person ‘we’ are. It does hurt (and I’m still wondering ‘WHY’, when you thought the ‘friend’ of yours to be genuine enough who only goes ahead to include you in their discussions of back-bitching). But then every person we meet or come across cannot be our friend, right?

So let those around you who bother you be the way they are. This in no way means that you act meekly in front of them or become subservient to their demands, for you too are of great importance! If you happen to witness their acts of filth, confront them, talk to them until they themselves feel ashamed or embarrassed of their deeds, and if they still continue to utter shit on your face, just smile to let them know you are at a far higher pedestal than where they stand!:)

Now am “I”

The “me” inside which grew all these years,

Wore new clothes and shed many others,

The “self” that met many and a few,

Matured over time, being the same yet new,

The “unconscious” with its bundles of complexities,

Kept weaving and tracing my paths with a history of mysteries,

The “soul” inside me enlivened every moment,

Every time it would seek pleasure,

In the beautiful melodies my ears would listen,

And then no one could stop the way my heart danced,

The waves that performed for me,

I felt no less than in trance!

This day I pledge to live,

This moment I smile with happiness,

The days of glory are here,

Now the present is offered,

I take my hands, and fold,

To the almighty who bestowed all this on me,

May God bless your beautiful souls,

As you love him, and he loves thee!

You – “My Mirror”

Credits: Mark Lewanski

These years that swept by,

Like a wave dissolving a sand castle,

The girl wrote poems and stories,

Of a life, perhaps worthy being a novel.

The words were her power,

The thoughts, the backbone, like an ink

A dip of the pen, pierced the memories,

With freshness, in which past had sunk.

Who knows it was true or false?

The readings she thought to have read,

Of the events that were overpowering,

This while she thought to have learnt,

From her every back step.

In a market full of treasures,

In a mirror, she saw a lady,

Behind whom a girl stood,

Longing to touch it, but a li’l wary!

The mirror brought her closer

Facade

How easy it is to fool someone,

In this world full of innocents,

And for every mask they wear and remove,

There are some to be happy,

And those who lament.

Shed a tear, wipe it away,

Clean your face; you’re the same again,

An experiment to test,

Will give you answers at best.

Those bonded intuitively,

Shall catch you in time,

And those far from you,

Will never ever rhyme.

The ‘real’ in this world,

Is hard to find,

For millions keep speaking,

But it appears a mime!

The social world which we made to live,

The fake smiles which we accept and give,

It’s the mind and the heart,

Which remain true to you,

‘Coz inside they reside,

Outside, they feel all blue.

And the irony of ironies,

Exists in this life,

We know we are being deceived,

Yet we wish to strive,

The false hopes and high expectations,

One day they’ll all crumble,

And go on a long vacation.

Then we’ll cry for not having accepted,

That this life is a mask,

With many facades,

One on your left, a million on the right,

You too a part,

But just not ‘in- sight’.

It’s a jungle of madness,

All sensible, yet crazy,

Its operations, so human,

But administrates mechanically.

Why all the flattery?

Why licking other’s shoes?

Can we not be ourselves?

And do what we wish to?

A cycle of façade,

Don’t know if it has a history,

It all seems so new,

With a mysterious kind of mystery!

The value of a GIFT

‘Gift giving’ as a process may be exciting for some people, yes I would like to emphasize on ‘SOME’. I think many people in this world, however, consider it burdensome, to get gifts and to give gifts.

There is no human on this planet earth who doesn’t likes wonderful and pleasant surprises (and as the percentage goes, even those who hate surprises, there are not of our concern at the moment). Gifts have an immense potential to convey the way we feel about someone. More special a person is to us, the more willing we are to expend our precious time and effort to pick a gift that aptly suits the person. And what better way to get a return gift than a wonderful smile, a warm hug and a ‘thank you’ said right from the heart.

When people think of gift giving and receiving as something very tedious, the whole pleasure and the fun of it disappears in the thoughts of giving gifts matching the cost of the gift we received, getting a gift which is way too cheeky or cheap according to our taste or in return give a gift which shows the person where you stand and where he/ she stands.

Do you see any joy in this? NO! While I agree, that social obligations make it ‘mandatory’ for us to give gifts in return which match up or at least nearly match the standards of the gifts we have received, but can we not forget all that at some times and reflect on the feelings of love which goes along when someone gives and receives a gift?

I have too many thoughts in my mind at present, at how to put them in an order is difficult for me!

I personally love making my special and dear friends feel ‘special’ and they simply love the surprises, no matter how small they might be. Many times I have been surprised to the extent when some have told me that they have never ever received a hand-made card by anyone, while I love making hand- made cards. Cards made by self, where you might even just write a ‘thank you’, ‘I love you’, or ‘You are special’ hold more significance than ready made cards. Just the way the freshness, aroma, the softness of an oven fresh cake lures you to come near it and have a biiig bite of it, similarly anything custom- made for the ‘special person’ means more than anything to him/ her.

I would like to share how I make my dear ones feel special:

1. By buying gifts they deserve: While it may seem calculative, I do think that every gift has a ‘person to be given to’ in mind. So best friends get the best of the lot, and good friends get the good stuff of the lot, and casual friends are not given casual stuff! Why? Coz perhaps we don’t wish to show them that we cannot gift! For them, we especially ‘think’ and gift.

2. Words of love: These words go directly either into a card or a letter, especially written for my friends! You can try it too, it’s not that hard telling them how much you love them and how much they mean to you!

3. Going gaga over my friends: ITS VERY very easy, All you gotta do is, tell them how much you love, adore them and are happy for them, on wall posts, through messages, by tagging them in beautiful pictures, dedicating a song or a staus to them, until they get tired!! Lol;)…

Often while exchanging gifts, we end us receiving some which we dislike so much yet we have to put up a fake smile and thank them as if that was the best ever gift someone gave to us! These situations become extremely awkward, for we cannot let them know how much we loathe what they gave to us. I really don’t know how we handle such situations! They become so uncomfortable. So next time, when it is our turn, do we gift them something of the same range, or a higher range to let them know how giving we are, regardless of what they gave us!

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar says that continue to love and to be kind, continue to give no matter how much hatred you might get in return, a day will come when the person will realize and feel small for himself in front of all that he was given and then will make all the efforts to be more good to you than you were to him!. I even got to hear an interesting experience from an aunty on this one, and it was indeed astonishing.

I’ll end up on a happy note, coz I like happy endings.

Gift to show that you love,

Gift to show that you care,

Gift to bring a smile,

Gift to give a hug,

Gift sometimes, out of the blue,

Not always to those who mean to you,

Gift can be a simple thank you,

Or a smile that says ‘I love you’!